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Prostatitis and pain ejaculating
Sat, 11/07/2009 - 23:23
Hi,
I've a couple of problems that I need advice on, and one appears to have caused the other.
I'm 42 now. A year ago, after 21 years of marriage, my wife had an brief affair. We're still together, but I can't reach orgasm with her any more when we make love.
We saw a relationship councilor, who gave me PC muscle exercises to do to get more sensation. Since then, I've been diagnosed with prostatitis, I get blood in my semen, and my orgasms are very weak and non satisfying (and quite often painful), and I still can't orgasm with my wife. I'm on long term antibiotics and alpha blockers, which are not helping.
My GP says the PC exercises are nothing to do with the other problems, yet everything was fine physically before (but obviously not mentally) and masturbation was fine.
Is it best to abstain for a month or more ?
Any advice would be very welcome as this is causing me severe distress and my GP can offer very little help.
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Ok well I can safely say that your ability to reach orgasm with your wife has no direct link her affair, i.e., this is not your body saying "she cheated, therefore i can't reach orgasm with her".
Psychological / emotional / relationship issues can manifest themselves in physical issues, but in your case all your problems are caused by prostatitis and the alpha blockers.
If you really wanted to find some blame, there's a (small) possibility that the stress you suffered from learning about her affair contributed to your prostatitis - also STDs are a risk factor for prostatitis so make sure you both get checked.
However it's much more likely that your prostatitis was on it's way already - and also ... coincidences happen.
So your best option is to focus on your own physical / medical problem. If you can improve that, a better sex life will follow.
First of all, some GPs do not have extensive training in sex problems, so make sure to speak to a urologist or GUM (genito-urinary medicine) specialist if you have not already.
The treatment will depend on whether it's acute or chronic prostatitis. If your GP is offering little help you really need to see a specialist.
In the meantime you should talk to your wife about the medical issues and try to both come to an understanding that her affair, although emotionally distressing, is not the cause of your new sexual problems.
Also, a good diet and regular cardiovascular exercise will help with your prostatitis and with your sex life in general.